– How you bored me! You always need something! – A young woman, not hiding her irritation, pulls a four-year-old kid by the hand.
And there is. Our kids need something all the time. And if the kids need “that candy” or a toy or https://argoprep.com/blog/goal-and-strategy-for-schools/ that fell into his field of vision, here and now, then the older the child becomes, the more he “needs” – a new phone, a jacket like Masha’s, jeans of just such a brand …
How to prevent such conflicts? There are several ways:
When discussing the family budget, payments and expenses, do not isolate the child. Let him hear, be present, and even participate. This forms the understanding that money “does not grow on trees.”
Before going to the store, agree on what you can buy for your child and give him a choice. For example, you can choose what we will buy today, a chocolate bar or ice cream, the main thing is not to be persuaded by the child. “You’ve already made up your mind.”
For more serious purchases, specify the term. For example, I can buy you a new jacket after the 20th.
Give kids pocket money. Only having money will a child learn how to manage it rationally.
It’s about conflicts in stores and https://argoprep.com/blog/why-do-you-need-hexagonal-thinking-in-the-classrooms/. But, unfortunately, we are not immune from conflict situations in other areas. There can be many reasons: misunderstanding, distrust, reticence or unfulfilled expectations.
How to behave so that life does not turn into a continuous showdown?
Speak and listen. Another person cannot think “your thoughts” and do “your desires”. Therefore speak! Talk about what you want, what you expect, what you like or don’t like. The more precisely you express yourself, the easier you are to be understood. And listen. Do not ignore wishes and requests, even if they seem unimportant to you.
Discuss. All situations. Is always. This way you can reach understanding and outline solutions.
Use the “I-statement”, that is, talk about your feelings about a particular situation. For example: “When you’re late and don’t call, I get worried.”
And never insult a child – “you are stupid”, “your hands are growing out of the wrong place” or “where your brainless head was”. By doing this, you push the child away and build a wall of alienation between you.
It is the parents who shape the behavior of the child. If you show that conflicts can be resolved constructively, then your child, having gone out into the big world, will solve them that way.
Topics such as “pocket money” or “tantrums in the store” require more serious consideration and immersion, which means we don’t say goodbye …
How to enter into a healthy parent-child dialogue? How to help a child to start speaking out his desires and problems constructively, to communicate in a team, to fulfill himself in communication?